think

Notice that the last time i wrote in my blog was in January? and now it is almost the end of July. Since i started working, i didnt have much time to write anymore, i didnt have the time to read my novels either. things are slowly changing and im losing pace of my own self. god knows i miss writing and just spending hours in front of my laptop trying to write something good in my blog ((although i know people never reads it and i know my posts are actually boring)) but hey lets keep a positive mind here because i've been dealing with so much negativity this past few months. i've been dealing with people who questioned my choice of job, with how i live my life and how i deal with it. i guess some minds cant be change or even mend, its just the way they think all their lives. im so sick of people questioning me, why do i choose this path when my diploma is a whole different thing? as one of my friend said to me, shit happens. im not living my life to please people, im doing the things i love now and people need to stop judging. you may not understand what im doing, but it doesnt give you the right to tell me what to do. why cant people just mind their own business, why do you have to butt in into people's life? im experiencing new things while youre stuck in your own damn world. you should know that, every work is worth something to someone. they're making money on their own, with good jobs, so please, back off and shut your mouth if you dont have anything nice to say. 

so here goes another rant, things that i've been keeping inside my head like most of the time. body shaming. yeah it may be nothing to most but it meant a lot to a minority, like myself. you may think what you said is all joke and stuff, but deep down inside, its eating me alive, slowly. i love my body, i do but people like you, made me think twice about myself. why would you say such things without even thinking? so like saying that its a joke, will make it better? i may smile and laugh it away and say its okay i get it, its a joke but when im alone i started thinking of how offended the words that's coming out of your mouth. some jokes are acceptable but some aren't. please limit yourself and think twice before saying anything about body shaming. you may find it funny but to some its just slowly mending their soul. i know we shouldnt take things "seriously" but how long do i have to pretend that your jokes doesnt bother me? or even hurt me? 

2.19am